Space
by Miss Poirot
Summary: Weir/Caldwell. Rated M for sexual contents. I decided to divide the story into 3 short chapters. Million thanx for Lluvia.Nieve and Kercsi for their wonderful beta-works!
1. Chapter 1

The screen of the palmtop turned a shade of light green, when Elizabeth Weir exited the chess-game-program with a fast click.

"You won," she told Colonel Caldwell without any sign of jealousy. Actually, it was still she who led their score-list with winning four times from six.

"I guess you had a hard day, maybe that's why you were so distracted," he said with that sharp, stern look of his, which made it almost impossible to find out whether he wanted to tell her something comforting, or if he wanted to humiliate her. She wondered which one was the nearest to his true intention.

"A hard day?" She smiled wearily, "I suppose it was rather a hard week."

"I understand." His voice was calm and firm. She hoped that the first option, the comforting one, would prove to be right. He made a slight motion in the direction of the desk, "Shall we play again, or would you like to take a rest?"

"If it's okay with you, I would like to go now, take a shower, and try to sleep," she moaned, and closed her palmtop. "Good night, Colonel Caldwell."

They both got up from their respective chairs. She rounded the desk, and headed for the automatic door. She was really tired, and her thoughts were already in her bedroom when she suddenly stopped. She perceived that he would step in her way. She expected that he would start again, coming up with his _brilliant_ ideas about her having a long vacation on the Earth and leaving the base in the hands of the military forces. She wasn't in the mood to argue about _that_. She thought if he began this boring, unending contest again, she would punch him and leave without saying a word. Well, it would not be the best diplomatic solution of the situation, but she felt that she was at the end of her strength today; she was unable to stand up against Caldwell's usual, ice cold, unshakeable arguments.

It took her a minute to notice that he was not about to start up a fight. Caldwell's eye wandered to her lips. She felt her cheeks blushing slightly.

"Oh my God," she whispered as she realized what he wanted. She stepped backwards.

"Good night, Doctor," he said slowly, his eyes still focusing on her lips.

"G... good night..." she mumbled, totally dumbfounded. She backed up until she reached her desk. Caldwell followed her with determined, rigorous steps.

"Are you afraid of me?" he asked scornfully.

She blushed even more, "You are really disagreeable, you know that?"

Caldwell touched her face with his fingers.

"Are you sure?" His voice remained calm, but an eager glimmering appeared in his eyes.

Elizabeth turned away. It was almost unbelievable how much she liked that touch. It nearly burnt her cheek with an impulsive, luscious impression that made her breathe heavily. Her imagination brought up pictures of him giving her more and more of this pleasure. First her cheeks, then her neck and then... The realistic part of her mind took over. _Goddamn soldiers! The worst thing about the military: the high-ranking commanders always think that the whole world is built up for them, and if they just make a slight motion, everyone will kneel down for them. That is definitely not a healthy attitude. Maybe they get used to it during their service, but it is not something I can bear. I will not act like that._

"I'm going to sleep now," she said, harshly, and pushed away his hand. She left her office as fast as she could. When she arrived at her sleeping-chamber, she felt her heart still throbbing in her chest. She sat down on the side of her bed, and buried her face into her palms.

* * *

Over the next two weeks, while the Daedalus and its crew helped Atlantis to organize some preparation against the Wraiths, Elizabeth was more than striving to avoid Caldwell, and it seemed that it suited him alright, for he did not make any effort to change that fact. She was glad to see that he did not mention their "affair", and he let her do her job without trying to personalize their relationship again.

On the last day, when she escorted Colonel Caldwell to his spaceship, she saw on his face that he wanted to tell her something privately, but she quickly signed for Zelenka to join them to check if everything was ready for the Daedalus to begin its long journey to the Earth. Caldwell seemed resentful as Zelenka stepped next to them and started to brag about some developments he made in his newest research. As they reached the entrance, Caldwell stopped.

"I want to say something to_ Doctor Weir_," he said with such emphasis that Zelenka had to understand that it was not something for his ears to hear. He apologized, and went to the engineering system.

Caldwell turned to Elizabeth.

"When I come back, I'd like to have a _nice welcome_ from you," he said with an insidious shade in his voice that made her feel really uncomfortable.

"Well, okay, I'll do my best." Her answer was in official tone. "Good luck on your journey."

She felt relieved when he left.


	2. Chapter 2

She was not sure, if she was waiting for Caldwell to come back or not. Atlantis needed the supplies carried by the Daedalus, and she was always glad to hear the latest news about the Earth from people who were coming back from there, but the thought of meeting Colonel Caldwell made her feel creepy. She always suspected that he was an arrogant, superior, shrill fellow in his private life as in his work, but until that ominous evening, it was just a guess. Now she was certain. Though she knew he was an honest, straight, and basically good man, she felt something odd about him. She intensively disliked typically military-style men, and Caldwell was absolutely one of those.

The fact that she spent so many hours thinking of him, of his behavior, made her feel violated.

* * *

On the day the Daedalus arrived back at Atlantis, Elizabeth Weir quickly found an alibi for herself, and travelled to the shore to check if Teyla's people were doing well. Sheppard and McKay were surprised and Teyla was too. It was unusual of Weir to do that, especially at the time of the Daedalus-arrival. She was always the first to greet the staff of the ship.

"I guess that something is going on," Teyla told Sheppard when they were on their way to the great passage which led them to the stairs not far from the place where the Daedalus was landing.

"You mean...?" Sheppard's face was blank.

"Have you ever seen Doctor Weir so enthusiastic about visiting my tribe? McKay reminded her that this was the day when the Daedalus was to arrive, and she didn't even care."

"Do you think she is not satisfied with you, and she is testing your job by asking your people?

"Oh, no, no," Teyla shook her head. "This is not about me, I'm sure of that."

Sheppard did not understand, and Teyla did not mention anything else, but her suspicions were justified as she saw the annoyance appearing on Colonel Cadwell's face when he realized that Sheppard was the person who greeted him, and escorted him to the conference room, where they could change their reports.

* * *

Elizabeth Weir arrived back at Atlantis late in the evening. She hoped that Sheppard had organized everything for the crew of the Daedalus, and that she would not have to deal with them for a while. Somehow, she felt a strange excitement, when she thought of Colonel Caldwell returning to Atlantis again. This pleasant fever turned into an awkward one as she took another left in the corridor, and caught sight of Caldwell standing next to her office.

"Oh, no," she moaned, tried to turn around and to leave without being seen, but it was already too late.

"Doctor Weir, nice to meet you again," he said with a disgustingly ironical shade in his voice.

"Good evening, Colonel. How was your journey?" she asked, hoping her tone of voice sounded cold enough to make him see that she was not at all interested in his answer.

"Long and boring as usual," He stepped forward. Elizabeth took one step backwards involuntarily.

"Well, it's not good to hear that," she said, "I suppose you should take a rest now with your team. Or do you have something to report to me, in which case, it can wait until tomorrow."

"No, nothing to report." Caldwell went to her with an assertive, supercilious look on his face.

"Oh, okay, then good night to you," she murmured, and wanted to turn around as soon as possible, but he caught her by the arm.

"Where is my welcome present?" he asked derisively, and touched her hair with his other hand. She closed her eyes and wondered if he noticed how loud her heart was beating. He pulled her hair not roughly, but firmly to make her face turn to his.

She felt his light breathe on her lips and opened her eyes in a flash. Caldwell grabbed her shoulders, tugging her to him. She lifted her shaking hands quickly between their bodies, and pushed his muscular chest as hard as she could to keep him away from her far enough so that he could not kiss her.

"Please," she whispered. Her eyes were begging.

"It's about Sheppard, isn't it?" he asked snarling.

"John? No, no, you've misunderstood…" Elizabeth shook her head at first flurried, but then she caught sight of the arrogant, jealous, anger gleaming in his eyes, and she exploded: "Oh my God, how can you be so conceited? Are you even unable to imagine that a woman declines you because of _your_ personality?"

"Hmm... whatever you just say." Caldwell bent over her neck, and bit her so hard that she screamed out loud.

"Stop it." Elizabeth struggled, and wished he had not been so strong, and that he had not been able to pin her to the wall in a way as to ward off her desperate efforts to free herself from his grip.

"I... missed you... so much... and... I... want you..." he moaned between his fierce bites.

"Leave me alone, let me go." Elizabeth began pummeling his chest, though it seemed he could not even feel her hits. His teeth left aching, painful spots on her skin. After a while, she lowered her hands wearily, and pressed her palms to the wall behind her back. She could nearly feel the pulsation of the electricity as the ZPM sent its energy waves all over the city. Caldwell pulled her even closer.

Elizabeth bent her head backwards and gasped, while his body - stiffened by his desire - forced her against the wall so hard that the whole world darkened before her eyes. She was only seeing colors, all kinds of dazzling, shimmering colors, mostly red and green. She sighed softly, "I know that it hurts you too, but if you go on like that, you will destroy both of us."

This sentence made Caldwell freeze. He seemed as if the floor had cracked beneath him, and as if he had fallen into the endless, icy amount of water under Atlantis. He let her free, and turned his head away.

"Yes, you're right. I'm sorry, Doctor Weir." He adjusted his crumpled uniform. "If... if you could excuse me... My journey was long, and I'm tired, and I'm... I'm out of myself."

He didn't even look back at her, he just left.


	3. Chapter 3

After that day, Caldwell seemed to completely forget his previous, seductive behavior. Days passed, then weeks, then months, and the Daedalus went on with its long journeys between the two Galaxies, and he did not show any sign of personal attachment to Doctor Weir. She sometimes felt embarrassed when he was close to her, but she hid it perfectly. If he still had that longing for her, then he hid that most perfectly. They both seemed to share a simple, practical stolidity for each other. Teyla alone looked as if she felt some kind of uneasiness about the two of them, for every time when Elizabeth Weir and Colonel Caldwell sat next to each other in the conference room, or just talked about some details of a plan in the dining-quarter, her eyes weighed on them with a mysterious, deep look, which was almost impossible to read. Caldwell hated that look because it reminded him of that night when Elizabeth had told him that last sentence. Elizabeth hated that look because it reminded her of that touch when Caldwell had stroked her face in her office after the chess-game.

* * *

Elizabeth Weir stood by the window of her office. Over the metal-balustrades there swirled the endless silver-blue of the ocean. The light, brisk fragments of foams were dancing in the air above the heavy water. Her eyes mirrored the mad playground of the crispy waves. She fell deep in her thoughts. There were always the problems that came up again, and again, no matter how hard they worked for the solutions. Atlantis was in danger anytime of the year.

She suddenly heard the automatic doors sliding into the wall, and firm steps knocking on the floor. She sighed and turned around. It was Caldwell. He went next to her, and then looked at the ocean as well. Elizabeth had no idea, what he had to tell her. She turned back to the window too.

"I suppose you heard that the Daedalus had been ordered back to the Earth," he said slowly.

"Yes," her short reply came. She tried to focus on the whirls in the water.

"We are leaving tomorrow. I've been given a week off, I think I will spend it in Quantico. The Stargate Command made it clear that they would need the help of the Daedalus against the threatening of the Ori. It has become so serious that I guess I won't come back here for a while."

She gave no response. Caldwell stepped behind her, and put his hands on her waist. She did not stir.

"It may happen easily that I will die at the battlefield. It may happen that I will never ever come back again. It may happen that this is the very last time we could see each other." Caldwell's voice was ice cold. He curved his fingers hard into her flesh. "Don't you want to... hmm... say good-bye to me?"

Elizabeth quivered in his arms. She took his right hand, pulled it to her mouth and placed a small kiss on his skin. Caldwell, whose austere gaze was scanning the silvery waves of the great sea surrounding Atlantis, stroked her soft, cool cheek.

"Alright," Elizabeth whispered in an almost inaudible tone. "Fuck me. Now..."

Caldwell did not expect his vile emotional extortion to persuade her. In point of fact, he imagined her becoming angry and leaving him with despising wrath on her face. Elizabeth's woeful voice and her light kisses showed something else, totally else.

With his other hand which was not occupied by her trembling lips, he stroked her left breast. He felt her hardening nipple grazing his fingers through the soft texture of her bra and her t-shirt. Caldwell groaned from the urge burning his groin, when he heard Elisabeth swallow hard.

"You want it here? On your desk?" he asked. His throat dried as well as hers. He imagined her nice body pushed on her back, stretched among the paper piles on the severe surface of the furniture. He felt that in this very moment his passion could break out of him, but he controlled himself.

"It's all the same. It doesn't matter, where." Elizabeth whispered. She pulled his hand closer to her face, while he was rubbing her nipple harder. It gave her pain, she whimpered, and bit the skin of his palm.

"No... not here..." Caldwell murmured with a sudden decision, and stepped away from her. "Let's go to your bedroom!"

Elizabeth gave no answer, just adjusted her t-shirt and headed for the door. He wondered what it would take to make her show any sign of feelings for him. He followed her to the - so called - elevator and they teleported themselves to the other side of the city-complex. Caldwell was not sure how they got to her sleeping-chamber; he just tugged her through the opening door, and dragged her in the direction of the bed. He pushed her down onto the thin mattress.

"That's all you need me for, isn't it?" she asked bitterly.

"You know that it's not true," Caldwell answered as he was twitching the strong, drab trousers down on her white, slim hips and lower.

"What do you want from me, then?"

"I want you to come back with me to the Earth." He climbed on top of her, and with a rough motion he turned her on her back. "I want to take you home. I want you to be with me at a place where nothing else matters just the two of us... somewhere beautiful... I would try it again... I know that I did everything badly, but if I could start it from the beginning then everything could go in another way... You deserve my whole attention, you deserve care. I would give you a bunch of red roses and... and..." His voice broke, his desire overwhelmed him. He tugged away the few clothes that kept him away from her then thrust himself violently into her. Elizabeth's head fell back onto the pillow, and her sad, weary eyes stared at the silver colored ceiling.

"You can come with me tomorrow, if you want," Caldwell panted. Though he knew beforehand the answer, he felt he must have said something. Anything. He wanted desperately to feel the pleasure he had craved so long, but he needed to see any sign of vividness on her face to reach that. He hoped that his futile sentence would alert her to her surroundings and would not let her switch her mind off and sink into numb, stolid darkness.

"Yes, maybe I can," she sighed and caught for breath as he was dipping into her again and again, "but I will not."

"Why don't you want me?" Caldwell asked hoarsely. His movements became harder and harder as the bitterness in his heart began to escalate to fury.

"I don't know whether I want you or not. What I know is that we'll never be together. We are not good for each other." Elizabeth's voice failed. Her surrendering motionlessness seemed to break. She lifted one of her legs, embraced his hips with it, and pressed him closer to her. Caldwell felt that it would be impossible for him to get deeper into her than he was already. Their eyes met. Elizabeth's face was wet with tears from her pain.

"It's too late to say that," he panted.

"I know. I love you, too."

Caldwell collapsed onto her, and let his maddening passion move his body with unintentional tugs while he was pressing his partner with all his weight into the measly mattress.

* * *

Colonel Caldwell stood before the monitor, and he was staring merely at the plenty of black and white spots running through and through the screen - left after the message. _The Apollo Mission... Replicators... Doctor Weir... sacrifice... she is dead... dead... dead..._

He tried to get to the commander's seat with firm steps, but it seemed to him that the place around him was twisting slowly into an amorphous, misshapen form. His steps became uncertain and disconcerted. He collapsed into the seat as if all of his muscles had lost their strength. Maybe that was what had happened for a moment. He tried to focus on one point on the controlling table to make the distorted, dizzying wobble disappear. He rubbed his forehead.

"Colonel, is everything alright with you?" An underling asked.

"I suppose so." His voice sounded calm, unexpectedly calm.

He got up, and went to the left side of the control room. There was a smaller monitor there with a map of the nearby stars on the screen. He looked at the black mass surrounding the glimmering spots of the stars. The endless, dark Space... She died somewhere out there, alone in the absorbing, icy nothing. This mirthless darkness was the last thing she had seen.

The worst thing was not that he had told her those horrible things about _him_ not coming back, about _him_ dying in the cold darkness of the space. The worst thing was not that he had refused to sleep with her on their one and only last night together. The worst thing was not that he had never kissed her. The worst thing was not that he had passed by her without even saying good-bye on the day he left Atlantis.

The worst thing was that till this very moment he had believed that he would travel back for her one day. Actually, it had been his only private plan for the future.


End file.
